Revealed: Why Santa Got Stuck Up the Chimney
Wednesday, August 19th, 2009
John Smith asked:
Santa is arguably one of the greatest guys around as, although history is certainly littered with the tales of great men and women, Santa has always been there for us. Indeed, every year without fail, he makes sure the bottom of our Christmas trees are littered with beautifully wrapped Christmas gifts; and he even manages to put in appearances at the odd shopping centre or two.
Regularly appearing in media campaigns and popular culture, Santa is usually portrayed as a rather large gentleman, sporting both a white beard and a red outfit, in addition to stylish black boots. And he works with a team of elves, in addition to a gang of reindeers to make sure your Christmas gifts arrive on time.
But what about Santa’s chimney-related exploits? It’s well known that Santa has historically favoured the use of a chimney as a means of entering properties – how he manages to get inside houses and flats where there is no chimney is another matter – so it’s important to uncover exactly how he came to find himself stuck within one; after all, were this to occur on a regular basis, it could impact upon his ability to deliver Christmas gifts! And as a professional, this type of mishap should surely not occur?
According to reports, when Santa found himself stuck up the chimney he began to shout, which of course is perfectly natural. After all, if there was soot in your bag, and you were suffering from an itchy nose, who wouldn’t be mad? And his assertion that, unless he was pulled out, boys and girls wouldn’t get any toys is perfectly valid.
But how did he find himself in this situation to begin with? One polite explanation could be that he simply found himself saddled with too many Christmas gifts at once, and that he couldn’t climb down a chimney with such a heavy sack full of goodies. However, as nice as this claim sounds, there is evidence to support the accusation that the chimney incident was actually the result of his weight. Although it would be rude to suggest that Santa is overweight, it would be reasonable to assume that his attempts to travel down this particular chimney was probably akin to a camel trying to pass through the eye of a needle.
But what if a particular property does not have a chimney? This could potentially have disastrous consequences for the delivery of Christmas gifts in time for the big day. But, as there have been no reported delivery issues, it looks as though this isn’t really an issue. Indeed, there is the definite possibility that he could always just walk in through the front door – it’s just that the suggestion doesn’t really seem all that magical.
So, in the future what can Santa do to avoid a repeat of the chimney incident? Aside from losing a few of those extra pounds, Santa could make use of grapples and transportation equipment that might be more commonly found in action films like Batman or James Bond. He could even get some of his helpers to come out with him especially for deployment down particularly small chimneys.
However, perhaps it’s actually time for Santa to modernise and change with the times? Instead of climbing down chimneys, or breaking in through the front door, why doesn’t Santa start capitalise on the growing trend towards shopping online? After all, if Santa got onto the Web 2.0 bandwagon, children could switch from writing letters to creating a web-based wish list. Santa’s helpers could then ensure that gifts were dispatched by next day delivery. Not having to travel the world on Christmas Eve would then free up a lot of Santa’s time on Christmas Eve, making it possible for him to concentrate on other things, such as developing new and exciting Christmas gifts.
But what would happen to Santa’s reindeers? What would Rudolph and his colleagues do? Maybe they could stick to what they do best and start up their own courier service. After all, ‘Rudolph Express’ express has quite a nice ring to it, and Santa would certainly give Rudolph a glowing reference!
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Santa is arguably one of the greatest guys around as, although history is certainly littered with the tales of great men and women, Santa has always been there for us. Indeed, every year without fail, he makes sure the bottom of our Christmas trees are littered with beautifully wrapped Christmas gifts; and he even manages to put in appearances at the odd shopping centre or two.
Regularly appearing in media campaigns and popular culture, Santa is usually portrayed as a rather large gentleman, sporting both a white beard and a red outfit, in addition to stylish black boots. And he works with a team of elves, in addition to a gang of reindeers to make sure your Christmas gifts arrive on time.
But what about Santa’s chimney-related exploits? It’s well known that Santa has historically favoured the use of a chimney as a means of entering properties – how he manages to get inside houses and flats where there is no chimney is another matter – so it’s important to uncover exactly how he came to find himself stuck within one; after all, were this to occur on a regular basis, it could impact upon his ability to deliver Christmas gifts! And as a professional, this type of mishap should surely not occur?
According to reports, when Santa found himself stuck up the chimney he began to shout, which of course is perfectly natural. After all, if there was soot in your bag, and you were suffering from an itchy nose, who wouldn’t be mad? And his assertion that, unless he was pulled out, boys and girls wouldn’t get any toys is perfectly valid.
But how did he find himself in this situation to begin with? One polite explanation could be that he simply found himself saddled with too many Christmas gifts at once, and that he couldn’t climb down a chimney with such a heavy sack full of goodies. However, as nice as this claim sounds, there is evidence to support the accusation that the chimney incident was actually the result of his weight. Although it would be rude to suggest that Santa is overweight, it would be reasonable to assume that his attempts to travel down this particular chimney was probably akin to a camel trying to pass through the eye of a needle.
But what if a particular property does not have a chimney? This could potentially have disastrous consequences for the delivery of Christmas gifts in time for the big day. But, as there have been no reported delivery issues, it looks as though this isn’t really an issue. Indeed, there is the definite possibility that he could always just walk in through the front door – it’s just that the suggestion doesn’t really seem all that magical.
So, in the future what can Santa do to avoid a repeat of the chimney incident? Aside from losing a few of those extra pounds, Santa could make use of grapples and transportation equipment that might be more commonly found in action films like Batman or James Bond. He could even get some of his helpers to come out with him especially for deployment down particularly small chimneys.
However, perhaps it’s actually time for Santa to modernise and change with the times? Instead of climbing down chimneys, or breaking in through the front door, why doesn’t Santa start capitalise on the growing trend towards shopping online? After all, if Santa got onto the Web 2.0 bandwagon, children could switch from writing letters to creating a web-based wish list. Santa’s helpers could then ensure that gifts were dispatched by next day delivery. Not having to travel the world on Christmas Eve would then free up a lot of Santa’s time on Christmas Eve, making it possible for him to concentrate on other things, such as developing new and exciting Christmas gifts.
But what would happen to Santa’s reindeers? What would Rudolph and his colleagues do? Maybe they could stick to what they do best and start up their own courier service. After all, ‘Rudolph Express’ express has quite a nice ring to it, and Santa would certainly give Rudolph a glowing reference!
Create a video blog
